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9th July 2009, 07:18 PM
|  | TST Oracle | | Join Date: Jul 2008, 8,171 posts. Location: UK Norfolk ..... Reputation:  | | | R.I.P. Common Sense
Saul Anuzis
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who
has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was,
since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He
will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain; Why the early bird gets the
worm; Life isn’t always fair; and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend
more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children,
are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy
charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended
from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for
reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the
job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly
children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental
consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could
not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an
abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a
burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to
realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in
her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by
his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers:
I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I’m A Victim
Not many attended his funeral because so few realised he was gone.
__________________ Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming...
Damn, What a ride!! | 
18th July 2009, 08:34 PM
|  | TST Member | | Join Date: Feb 2009, 81 posts. Location: Steeler Nation Capital Reputation:  | | |
Someone forgot cousins; I don't know, I don't care, and Doesn't matter.
Dan
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18th July 2009, 10:28 PM
|  | TST Oracle | | Join Date: Jul 2008, 8,171 posts. Location: UK Norfolk ..... Reputation:  | |
Is that a q ??
__________________ Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming...
Damn, What a ride!! | 
20th July 2009, 02:09 AM
|  | TST Member | | Join Date: Feb 2009, 81 posts. Location: Steeler Nation Capital Reputation:  | | |
Black M.,
Here's another branch of the family:
the A**'s,
Wise the dad,
Smart the mom,
Lazy the oldest boy,
Kiss the girl and
Dumb the youngest son.
Dan
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